The cream to my tea

Sebenernya ini ditulis di notes handphone karena hasrat bercerita kepada orang baru. Tapi karena sampai saat ini belum tertuangkan ke orang nya, ya sudah, cerita di sini. Kan ulang tahun gue 12 Maret ya, baik-baik aja tuh. Tapi ada kejadian aneh di satu hari setelah nya, yaitu 13 Maret. Gue lagi otw tempat kerja, baru sampai Stasiun Univ. Pancasila. Gue turun dan langsung jalan ke arah pintu keluar. Eh di tengah-tengah stasiun, ada nih Mba-Mba lagi duduk madep ke jalan raya (membelakangi peron). Gue perhatiin dia lagi teleponan, ya gue tetep jalan dong. Pas gue lewat Mba nya, gue denger suara isak tangis, gue reflek berhenti. Tadi nya mikir, masa pagi-pagi udah ada kejadian horor? Terus gue nengok kanan-kiri lagi, bingung nyari sumber suara. Gue liat ke arah Mba nya dong, dia emang lagi teleponan dan setelah gue perhatiin lagi, dia ngobrol sama orang yang dia lagi telepon sambil nangis dan sedikit teriak ngegas gitu. Kayak sedang mencoba menjelaskan sesuatu, tapi sambil nangis gitu...

Alo, D. How are ya? I want to have a talk, and I need you to listen carefully. Got it? You're a natural empath, aren't ya? You have a good heart, your prayers always goes to your loved ones. You listen to their stories. Yet, you never listen to yours. What's the use of being an empath, if you can't even hear yourself? That's why I'm here. I want to apologize. I'm sorry that I barely pay attention to what you really need, that I rarely focus on what you really want, and wasn't there for you when you need yourself the most. You always tell yourself, "I can't be happy now, I could do more." or "Don't be too sad, others had it worse." And I once again, and will never be tired to ask, why would you do that to yourself? You deserves happiness as much as others do and their bad days can't be the standard of your own feelings. But, again, it's all my fault that I was never there to remind you of that. But, D, other...

 Thank you for telling me those words. Thank you.

Tuhan, aku berdoa mohon Engkau dekat kan dua hal kepada ku; Satu, yang baik untuk ku; agar aku belajar menjaga apa dan mereka yang kusayang. Dua, yang buruk untuk ku; agar aku belajar menjaga diri ku sendiri.